1. Do not discard, this notice is not an invoice it is a courtesy reminder to register your domain name search engine listing so your customers can locate you on the web.
This is a sentence from one of those scammers that try to scare you into renewing your domain name at outrageous fees. Generally speaking, scammers don’t know beans about good writing. You know what I mean: the African ladies who really, really believe in God (and know that you do, too!) and just need your help extracting the measly $50 million they have in some bank. There are three sentences here, jammed together without the benefit of proper punctuation. Let’s see; this is what I would do:
Do not discard! This notice is not an invoice; it is a courtesy reminder to register your domain name search engine listing so your customers can locate you on the web.
2. Your ideal life – the car, the house, the vacations, the job, the relationships, seem very out of reach.
The problem with this sentence is the mixing of one dash with one comma in the parenthetical phrase. My suggestion would be to use two dashes, like so:
Your ideal life—the car, the house, the vacations, the job, the relationships—seem very out of reach.
Ah, but there’s a big problem. We’re talking about a “life”: one “life.” Well, with the parenthetical information properly separated, it becomes clear that the verb—“seem”—needs to be “seems,” not “seem.”
Your ideal life—the car, the house, the vacations, the job, the relationships—seems very out of reach.
And this guy is supposedly an “international best-selling author.” I guess it’s okay; he gives me some of my best stuff; he’s what I call a real go-to kind of guy!
3. Course guides are pocket sized magazines filled with information about the golf course and it’s facilities.
Ouch. “It’s” is it is or it has. The possessive of “it” is “its.” The #1 mistake. And where’s the hyphen in “pocket-sized”?
4. Every hole on the golf course is featured on it’s own 2-page spread.
And they made it TWICE! On the SAME PAGE!
5. All I know is that his mane and tail PERFECTLY compliment his super shiny coat.
Huge mistake. Huge. “Compliment” with an “i” means to give someone praise. I always remember this by thinking “I” compliment you. “Complement” with an “e” means that one thing “completes” something else: his tail complements his coat, the KitchenAid appliances complement the cabinetry, and so on. Using “compliment” for “complement” is the most common spelling mistake in real estate listings.
6. Throughout the years, his in-depth knowledge and insight into the mortgage industry has allowed his students to more thoroughly understand the concepts and principals outlined in the state broker exams.
I got a good laugh out of this mistake, from someone who claims to have 25 years of experience in the mortgage industry. It’s “principals”: “principals” is spelled wrong. For crying out loud! Here’s how I remember this: the “principal” is your “pal.” The “principal” is the highest-ranking official in a school, so a “principal” means major, the pinnacle, the ne plus ultra. And “principle” is the other use, the use that means guidelines, strictures, rules. Oh, how I’d like a look at this company’s instruction manual, which I hear is a total mess. But there’s a little bit more: this guy (supposedly) has in-depth knowledge and insight, which are two things, which means the verb should be “have,” not “has.”
7. He provides real-life examples and, frequently, humorous observations on many of the complex principals that make up the mortgage industry.
Yeah, well, when you don’t know how to spell something in one place, you generally misspell it in another. Wow. Very “humorous” indeed.
8. In order to insure these standards are met each state agency now participates in the Nationwide Mortgage Licensing System and Registry (NMLS).
Yeah, yeah. It’s “ensure,” not “insure.” If you aren’t writing specifically about insurance, it’s “ensure,” which means to make certain. Plus, I’d stick a comma after “met.”
9. I have already registered on NMLS, I have a Log In ID and password but I can NOT find my Unique Identifier number.
At a minimum, comma after “password” and no caps with “not,” and I would like to ask some questions about some of the capitalization before I’d give all that a pass.
10. Why should I get a license?
A.Every state in the country requires, those persons who arrange loans tied to real estate with another’s money must be licensed to be paid. Also, to be paid a referral fee, finders fee, bird dog fee, etc., you must be licensed otherwise it’s a kickback.
Ick. Let’s see. You need a space after the “A.” No comma after “requires.” I’d want to see “finders” as a singular possessive: “finder’s.” And for sure you need a semicolon after “licensed” and a comma after “otherwise.”
11. If the student does NOT complete the course during the scheduled timeframe as set forth at registration they will NOT receive credit for any time accrued. And the student will have to register for another class at an additional cost.
Quit it with the “NOT” capitalizations! The “if” triggers a comma after “registration.” “Timeframe” is incorrect; it is TWO words. Plus, you’ve got a little noun-pronoun problem because the “student” (singular) does not agree with the pronoun “they,” which is plural. Plus, the second sentence is actually a fragment; you’d need a semicolon (and drop the “and”) after “accrued,” or you’d need a comma instead of the period after “accrued” to make this correct.
12. ATTENTION: You may NOT take the same Continuing Education (CE) Course in 2 consecutive years. We will NEVER offer the same course 2 years in a row – so our students never have to be concerned will verifying what course they took previous year.
Quit it with the NOT and the NEVER caps! UGH! Why is “course” capitalized? Why is that a hyphen and not a dash? And, excuse me, did you mean “with,” but you wrote “will” instead? Ever proof your work? I guess NOT.
13. Each company’s compliance officer should also include a lesson on your companies specific program as well and add test questions on this to the test provided.
Gee, do you mean “company’s” specific program?
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