Wow! Jaw-droppingly horrible.
A drama based on the elite crew of firemen from Prescott, Arizona who battled a wildfire in Yarnell, AZ Iin June 2013 that claimed the lives of 19 of their members.
- Crew is a singular noun, so you can’t say “their” members.
- Comma after “Arizona.”
- Kinda awkward with that second “AZ,” which should be spelled out, and needs a comma when it is.
- Misspelling: Iin…
- “Their” should be “its.”
Here we go, with editorial suggestions in addition to punctuation/grammar corrections:
A drama based on the elite crew of firemen from Prescott, Arizona, who battled a wildfire in nearby Yarnell in June of 2013 that claimed the lives of 19 of its members.
I kind of like “an elite crew,” rather than “the” elite crew, but, hey, who’s nitpicky? Not moi!
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